Recently, we had the interior of our house painted. Now, when I say recently, I don't mean that you walk in the front door to wet paint signs, or the lingering smell of a completed race of brush strokes. No, we are at the point now where a single hand mark or blemish shows up and we immediately search for the kid that did it to come and clean it off. "Don't touch the walls on the way up the stairs!" and the innocent response "Why not, they aren't wet anymore?". It really is a nice way to give your place a "fresh start". It truly does change things up...but it leads to a whole lot more that I hadn't considered.
You see, when you change the color of the walls, there is an unadvertised clearance event that goes along with it that says immediately upon completion that everything must go. This is often only unbeknownst to the party that needed the convincing to paint. This is also the person in the relationship that owns the hideously outdated comfy chair from their first apartment and immediately gets defensive each time a conversation even detours towards de-cluttering. Anything but the chair!
No, this person has no idea what they have done when the big "refresh" happens. It's an absolute pandoras box, so take warning ye of little foresight. The key here is not to focus on the fact that every piece of furniture has to be moved, drop sheets need to be put down, and all of the laborious details that will come along with it....that right there is a distraction...a slight of hand that has been made on you to take your attention from the second impact that is coming. While you are thinking of all of the things that need to be done, and you are being made to feel like you are indeed helping to pick the actual colours that will transform the room into a new oasis from strips of one inch squares that are micro shades in the difference; the maestro of this orchestra has already considered and is directing you through to the second act.
Doesn't it look fantastic?! Isn't it great?! And you will fall for this and agree. You will truly believe that it does look so much better and that it was all worthwhile. And it definitely does! In most cases, the house is brighter, there is a renewed pride. I think we should invite the neighbours over soon...show it off while it's new! Then the phase two begins. Time to put the accessories back.
Well that's strange...the curtains no longer match the color scheme. We can't ruin this new look and everything we put into this by putting these curtains up. There is absolutely no winnable counter argument to this. The functionality of the curtains blocking out light doesn't matter because they aren't used for that purpose anyway. No, the curtains mostly sit evenly shaped on each side of the window covering precisely the same upper corner space of the sill, and are tucked neatly behind a couple of things that made some designer very rich whose sole purpose is to hold the curtains open so that they cannot do their job. With any luck, the curtain rods will be a neutral color and new hardware won't be required.
The lamp. Did you know that lamp shades need to match the walls in your house? And the side tables that they sit on are also now completely the wrong color. The maestro may give you a suggestion to buy some sort of chalk paint and make the tables match with some sort of color splash that apparently fits. If you didn't learn your lesson with painting the walls, then consider buying the paint. The couch cushions and the pillows that everybody throws to one side because there is no actual purpose to them but to take space when the couch isn't occupied....yes these all need to change. There is only one way out of this in my mind my fellow non designers; and that is weather the storm. The curtains are a no win situation and you will hear about them daily, so just get the new curtains...and potentially an area rug unless you have a dog. A dog can save you as soon as you mention the amount of dog hair that things like that could expose.
The key to weathering the storm is to begin to think a little bit like the maestro. Start complaining about the picture frames. Divert all the attention from the big expenses. The wedding photo that was custom framed that cost more to have done than the actual wedding itself. Yes that one. The one that was carefully selected because the frame and the matting would match the colours of the wedding party. Pick that one. Get the kids school pictures put into new frames that match the colours of the room. Buy them in multipacks at a local crafting store. Get a print or two made at Walmart...its about $20. Things are really looking good now. Then come back to the wedding photo. My guess, if you hunkered down just long enough, and you're no longer immediately struck by the difference each time you walk into a room, then you show the maestro the new frame and matting you found online that would really match up the wedding picture frame to the room (and not the dresses and the corsage's). I must stress that this cannot happen too early. Too early and you may get UNO reversed and actually have to carry through with it....but if you have waited long enough...you may find that the maestro agrees that enough is enough and it doesn't all have to happen at once. It's a delicate balance, and maybe a little bit of dirty pool to use the emotion of wedding colours to your advantage, but if you have done this correctly....you may have a few dollars left in your account, and will be able to walk into that new oasis every morning with a hot cup of coffee,...take a moment to scan the room and soak it all in...and take a seat in that hideous but oh so comfortable chair to admire.... a job well done.